Dragonfly Advocacy - support for child abuse survivors #sameherenoshamehere
Understanding, empathy & support from the author of Circling The Wagons
Dragonfly = transformation, renewal, resilience.
About Dragonfly Advocacy
What is Dragonfly Advocacy and how can I help?
I established the Dragonfly Advocacy website, after publishing my book, as a place for readers to reach out to me. But it has become so much more than that.
The more involved I got in the area of assisting adult survivors of childhood sexual abuse and also child protection, the more I came to realise that my website could include so many
I established the Dragonfly Advocacy website, after publishing my book, as a place for readers to reach out to me. But it has become so much more than that.
The more involved I got in the area of assisting adult survivors of childhood sexual abuse and also child protection, the more I came to realise that my website could include so many different features.
Such as –
- My blogs about my self-discoveries around IFCSA
- Child Safety & Protection Resource section
- Videos from my speaking events
- How to keep adolescents safe online from predators re – sextortion and grooming - SOS (Surf Online Safe)
- Organisations against Sexual Violence and counselling services – Laurel Place & Isabella Semeraro
- Men’s services such as SAMSN – (Survivors & Mates Support Network) & Strong Men DV Advocacy
- Educational Podcasts – WNMOT, CAPE, Gloria Masters & Beyond the margins
- Organisations in Aus for help with – child abuse prevention/support, mental health support and suicide prevention, domestic violence support, cyber safety and adult survivor resources etc.
- Other survivor book resources
- Rideshare safety tips
Please note - My role is of an advocate only. “Advocate” - a person who publicly supports or recommends a particular cause. My opinions and views should not take the place of your professionals.
I have no affiliation with any organisations or resources recommended, just an interest in child protection and adult survivors healing.
my book
Circling The Wagons Paperback is available for sale on my website (section below) for $35 delivered throughout Australia. Also Bookstores in Qld - listed further down.
EBOOK & PAPERBACK - AVAILABLE NOW GLOBALLY on online retailers such as Amazon, Barnes & Noble etc.
"Circling The Wagons" is a firsthand account of a survivor's struggles to
Circling The Wagons Paperback is available for sale on my website (section below) for $35 delivered throughout Australia. Also Bookstores in Qld - listed further down.
EBOOK & PAPERBACK - AVAILABLE NOW GLOBALLY on online retailers such as Amazon, Barnes & Noble etc.
"Circling The Wagons" is a firsthand account of a survivor's struggles to reclaim her life after dealing with intra-familial childhood sexual abuse trauma hidden within a family environment. Written for other survivors and friends/family members of survivors to get a true, in-depth and honest look into the devastating effects hidden abuse can have, when it is not dealt with for decades.
Testimonials
What a powerful message you are giving to survivors of all types of abuse. This is not your secret, it's your story! Shannon R.
What an honour to be trusted with your story Deb. Your journey has not defined you as a person, but one that will inspire others to stand up and be heard and hopefully let the healing begin. Donna P
Deborah has reclaimed her strength, courage, confidence and power in writing this book. I hope that by reading it many others in a similar situation, will be able to release guilt and self-blame and finally heal. Cynthia
It is heartbreaking to imagine that we need a book such as Circling The Wagons. That society needs a guidebook on how to navigate intra-familial sexual abuse. Deb delivers a candid insight into the internal dialogue of the survivor, whilst gently offering understanding and hope for healing. I recommend this book to anyone who is looking for clarity when troubled by the behaviours of their loved ones or those who continue to ignore or coverup what has happened to them. Rachael K
Meet the author
Meet the author
Hi, I'm Deb!
I not only endured my own abuse from a family member growing up and was silenced, but then heard stories from so many others over the years. This led me to try to help other survivors by telling my own story on a child protection organisations website.
Standing up in 2023 to advocate for others and to say this happened t
Hi, I'm Deb!
I not only endured my own abuse from a family member growing up and was silenced, but then heard stories from so many others over the years. This led me to try to help other survivors by telling my own story on a child protection organisations website.
Standing up in 2023 to advocate for others and to say this happened to me, opened up a dialogue with many survivors who had experienced similar abuse. I came up with the hashtag - #sameherenoshamehere - because I knew there were so many others in the same position as me. But the shame was never ours to carry.
I have continued my journey of advocacy by lending my lived experiences to survivor led workshops and also speaking events.
I have now been a guest speaker at
- Moreton Bay Says No To Violence - May 2024
- Bright Futures Forum Canberra - hosted by The Daniel Morcombe Foundation - October 2024
- Laurel Place Inc - Sexual Violence Awareness Month event - October 2024
- I also spent last year working on the AVA Project - Amplifying the voices of victim-survivors with the University of Melbourne, accumulating in a roundtable event in Melbourne November 2024.
And of course I'm here to support, educate and encourage adult childhood abuse survivors to find the peace they all deserve.
My ongoing mission is to help other adult survivors find their way through their pain and trauma to the other side, where healing and acceptance lives.
#sameherenoshamehere
adult child abuse survivors
Survivor Self Care
Meditation
Meditation is a wonderful and healthy way to relax more, breathe slower and deeper and learn how to calm both your mind and body.
Some of the benefits of meditation are -
- Reduced stress
- Improved sleep
- Reduce chronic pain
- Strengthen immune system
- Increased self-awareness
- Improved concentration
- Increased creativity
- Increased patience
- Reduced negative feelings
- Improved emotional regulation
- Improved mental health
Over the years I have come to realise just how shallow my breathing was. This developed from my heightened responses from my childhood abuse. Since I started meditation I have been able to communicate in a much more stable and regulated way, breathing my way through confrontation or toxic conversations. This had been a struggle for me previously and I highly recommend any survivors take this up. The more you do, the better you get. There are many apps such as Calm or Smiling Minds, that you can download on your phone. 10 mins a day will help you so much!
Exercise
Exercise has always been a part of my life. From playing tennis as a small girl, to lifting weights at the gym as an adult. Exercise has played a big part in me being able to get all the anxiety and tension out of my body, over the years.
Other benefits of exercise -
- Brain health - improving your memory, reducing anxiety and depression and lowering your risk of cognitive decline.
- Heart health - reducing your risk of heart disease and stroke etc.
- Bone health
- Weight management
- Blood pressure
- Mood enhancing
- Energy
- Immunity
- Inclusion - team sports
As survivors, what we went through has had negative effects on our mind and body, including our stress system.
Due to this we need to work even harder to keep our mind and body as healthy as possible and keep auto-immune illnesses at bay. Walking, gym, pilates, running, hiking, swimming or any team sports, are all so beneficial for your health.
Journaling
Journaling - how this has helped in my healing journey.
When I began writing about my childhood abuse, it was to help others from my pain. Although I had always had the confidence that my book would be able to benefit others, my writing has helped me immensely too.
Journaling has allowed me to work through so many questions that I didn't have answers for, my whole life. Secrets, silencing and lies were all uncovered, once I started writing and working through things like the words spoken during my abuse and the instances and timelines things happened.
Until I took the time out of my busy life to write, I never knew I could write a poem, or an analogy or a whole book! What a wasted life I would have lived, if I didn't take this time for myself.
Journaling can help you process difficult experiences, grow your self-confidence, get thoughts out of your head, reflect on events and free up mental space. That last one -"free up mental space" I found until I wrote things down, my mind would continue to circle back to certain events, but once written down, then I was free of these thoughts.
Relaxing - time just for you
Relaxing! What does this mean for you?
I have struggled all my life to relax. The way I ended up dealing with my trauma, was to never stop. Something in me thought this would be a good way to not have to think about my childhood abuse. And not stopping, made it real easy to go along with my life and not deal with it. But you can only go, go, go for so long, before your body breaks down.
I've had bumps in the road over the years, but the biggest road block for me, came about when I was in my early 30's. This came in the form of panic attacks! And for anyone who has experienced them, you will be well aware that these aren't something you can ignore. They make you have a real hard look at yourself and your life choices.
If you don't deal with your mind, your body will do it for you. Whether it's panic attacks, anxiety, depression or other illnesses. We all need to stop, take a breath and find the things we enjoy, to be able to relax in life.
Take a walk with a friend, go to the beach and take in the scenery, lie on a picnic blanket at the park and read. Anything that helps you find a bit more of the person you need to be in life.
The "you" that you may have lost over the years.
Self Care
Self care
If you don't care for you, who will? A lot of survivors will have forgotten over the years about themselves and their wants and needs. As the saying goes - "you can't pour from an empty cup." If you continue to give to everyone else, you will become depleted and feel empty inside.
I did this all my life, because I became a people pleaser. I only just realised why I needed to please others, at the expense of myself. And that's because I had very low self-esteem. The only way I could feel good about myself, was from getting external validation. I relied on other people telling me I had done well, because my abuser made me feel - stupid, took away my confidence and humiliated me. So my self-doubt took over in all aspects of my life. I didn't even know what I liked to do anymore, because I always did everything others wanted to do.
I LOST MYSELF!
But once I found out the truth about how CSA affected me, started to put myself and my wants first, I began to shine.
I now take care of me and do the things I like to do. Like gardening, spending time with friends, going for walks while listening to my favourite music etc. Find what you like to do, and everything else in your life, will fall into place and people will respect you, for knowing your worth.
Change someone's world
What if?
What if you could change someone's world? Change their life for the better. It's really not that hard, if you think about it. Little things can be done every day, to make someone else happy or give them hope for the future.
Have you ever had a stranger smile when you walked past them and out of nowhere you felt better? Just that small act made you feel good inside. There are people out there who just have this innate way of making you feel good. This could be a friend who picks you up, when you are down. Or that co-worker who cracks a joke, to make you laugh, when you're having a bad day.
Find happiness in your life from the little things. Being kind doesn't cost a thing. But can mean so much to another human being. Too many people focus on money or stardom these days, thinking that is the way to happiness. But it's not.
I feel "paying it forward" with kindness, support, empathy and love for others, is the only way to find true happiness in yourself.
If my book, this advocacy website or the work I am doing to help other survivors, has helped you - please let others know so they can also receive help, or find the resources on my website to stop another child from being abused. Or feel free to reach out to me via my contact form at the end of my website.
I would love to hear from you. But most of all, look after yourself and find the person you were born to be!
Deb's Advocacy, research involvement and speaking events
DEB'S ADVOCACY JOURNEY
HELPING FUTURE CHILDREN FROM HER LIVED EXPERIENCE
HELPING FUTURE CHILDREN FROM HER LIVED EXPERIENCE
Deb is a local Brisbane woman who has become an author, adult survivor advocate, research participant and lived experience speaker. Since standing up in 2023 to help other survivors find their voice and realise they are not alone, so many opportunities have opened up for Deb. She wrote her book "Circling The Wagons" to help survivors u
Deb is a local Brisbane woman who has become an author, adult survivor advocate, research participant and lived experience speaker. Since standing up in 2023 to help other survivors find their voice and realise they are not alone, so many opportunities have opened up for Deb. She wrote her book "Circling The Wagons" to help survivors understand better what they went through. But after this she still wanted to do more in this arena, where she saw very little conversations happening around "intra-familial childhood sexual abuse" So in May 2024, she first spoke at a Domestic Violence event, to open up the dialogue of child sexual abuse that happens in the home, being a form of - "Domestic Violence." Domestic means home and sexual abuse is violence! Why are we not speaking of this at these events?
HELPING FUTURE CHILDREN FROM HER LIVED EXPERIENCE
HELPING FUTURE CHILDREN FROM HER LIVED EXPERIENCE
HELPING FUTURE CHILDREN FROM HER LIVED EXPERIENCE
Within Deb's advocacy work she has travelled to Canberra to help show frontline workers what red flags to look out for to help save future children from abuse.
Deb co-presented at The Daniel Morcombe Foundation "Bright Futures" forum in October 2024.
Deb also spent this last year working on the AVA project - Amplifying the voices of vict
Within Deb's advocacy work she has travelled to Canberra to help show frontline workers what red flags to look out for to help save future children from abuse.
Deb co-presented at The Daniel Morcombe Foundation "Bright Futures" forum in October 2024.
Deb also spent this last year working on the AVA project - Amplifying the voices of victim-survivors: Advancing the harmful sexual behaviour evidence base roundtable - in Melbourne - November 2024, run by the University of Melbourne. She was one of five survivors who presented their key messages to policy makers for future reforms in child abuse prevention and education techniques.
MOVING FORWARD
HELPING FUTURE CHILDREN FROM HER LIVED EXPERIENCE
MOVING FORWARD
Deb was guest speaker at Laurel Place's "Sexual Violence Awareness Month" event at Caboolture in October 2024. She explained how due to her abuse as a small girl, she continued to find herself in unsafe relationships in her teens and adulthood.
One of Deb's focuses is getting abused teenagers help before they head down the road of negat
Deb was guest speaker at Laurel Place's "Sexual Violence Awareness Month" event at Caboolture in October 2024. She explained how due to her abuse as a small girl, she continued to find herself in unsafe relationships in her teens and adulthood.
One of Deb's focuses is getting abused teenagers help before they head down the road of negative, toxic and destructive pathways. She wants to try to help and educate young people early on, so they can heal and move forward in a healthy way.
Deb has also spoken on "The Cape - child abuse prevention education" podcast by an ex WA detective and "Handing the shame back" NZ podcasts to explain intra-familial abuse repercussions and is currently working on several editions of a USA podcast.
Child Safety & Protection Resources
The Daniel Morcombe Foundation - Keeping Kids Safe Resources
The Daniel Morcombe Foundation Keeping Kids Safe Resources have been created in memory of Daniel Morcombe to help keep other children and young people safe. Every year new resources will be developed and released.
The resources are written for a diverse range of students from prep to senior years and the suite contains over 20 videos and a
The Daniel Morcombe Foundation Keeping Kids Safe Resources have been created in memory of Daniel Morcombe to help keep other children and young people safe. Every year new resources will be developed and released.
The resources are written for a diverse range of students from prep to senior years and the suite contains over 20 videos and activities. They are best used as part of a comprehensive whole school approach to personal safety education and are aligned with the following:
- Australian Curriculum, Assessment and Reporting Authority (ACARA)
- Daniel Morcombe Child Safety Curriculum
- Health Promoting Schools Framework
Teachers have access to teacher guides to support classroom delivery and parent/carer resources are available to encourage discussions about personal safety at home.
Body Safe Cards by John Cardamone
For families, carers and organisations to teach children about body safety.
Empowering children
As adults, our responsibility is to protect our children, and one of the most effective ways to do this is through education. Body Safe Cards are here to help start those important conversations about body safety, boundaries and trust in an easy
For families, carers and organisations to teach children about body safety.
Empowering children
As adults, our responsibility is to protect our children, and one of the most effective ways to do this is through education. Body Safe Cards are here to help start those important conversations about body safety, boundaries and trust in an easy and engaging way.
Created by John Cardamone, a senior educator, speaker, and survivor of child abuse, John’s Body Safe Cards offer a valuable tool for empowering children.
Using simple, age-appropriate language and engaging activities, the Body Safe Cards introduce essential concepts such as personal boundaries, identifying trusted adults, and knowing what to do if children ever feel unsafe.
Available in physical format, these practical, easy-to-use flashcards are perfect for use at home, in the car, or on the go, making them a convenient resource for teaching vital safety skills.
$39.95
Physical cards are available mid January and only for orders placed in Australia. Postage is included in the price.
Click below to buy or contact John
https://johncardamone.com.au/body-safe-cards/
Conversations with Kids - Body Safety Cards by EX WA Detective Kristi McVee
Conversations with Kids - Body Safety Cards by EX WA Detective Kristi McVee
HOW TO USE THE CONVERSATIONS WITH KIDS CARDS
1️⃣ Choose Your Moment
Find a relaxed and private setting where you and your child can talk without distractions.
2️⃣ Start the Conversation
Use the prompts on the cards as conversation starters. Follow your child's lead and be attentive to their responses.
3️⃣ Listen and Validate
Listen actively to
HOW TO USE THE CONVERSATIONS WITH KIDS CARDS
1️⃣ Choose Your Moment
Find a relaxed and private setting where you and your child can talk without distractions.
2️⃣ Start the Conversation
Use the prompts on the cards as conversation starters. Follow your child's lead and be attentive to their responses.
3️⃣ Listen and Validate
Listen actively to your child's thoughts and feelings, validating their experiences and concerns without judgment.
4️⃣ Reinforce Body Safety Rules
Use the opportunity to reinforce important safety rules and boundaries in a positive and supportive manner.
ONLY $11 TO INVEST IN YOUR CHILDS SAFETY!
The Conversations with Kids™ cards provide an invaluable resource for parents dedicated to ensuring their children's safety. Kristi created this resource so that her knowledge and expertise around child safety can be accessible and affordable for everyone!
Kristi's mission is to reach as many parents as possible, providing them with the tools to protect their children effectively. Invest in your child's safety and well-being today!
Please note these are a DOWNLOADABLE resource, with the intention for you to print off and cut out the Conversations with Kids™ Cards.
Where to buy "Circling The Wagons" in Queensland
Locations to pick up a copy of my paperback -
- Samford Variety Store - Samford
- The Little Book Nook - Palmwoods
- Baffies Oan Bookstore - Samford
- Rendezvous cafe & bookshop - Dayboro
Circling the wagons was an amazing read and experience, as a childhood sexual abuse survivor myself, I was able to connect and relate to this book very easily. I had many moments reading this book that I could relate to, this has helped me to identify what steps I need to take next and support me to have confidence as an adult survivor.
Reading this book has great insights of what a survivor of childhood abuse may encounter through life and how to navigate through this. For such a difficult topic to write about, Deb has written with such passion and a clear purpose to help others through their healing. Thank you, Deb, for having the courage to write a challenging and sharing personal aspects of your life, for the benefit of others.
Absolutely highly recommend for anyone that wants a perspective from someone that has lived experience firsthand and how to enhance your life with simple and easy strategies to find your pathway to healing.
John Cardamone
Speaker, Educator and survivor
Podcasts & speaking events
WNMOT podcast- "We need more of this" with Scott Rado
I was fortunate enough to be on this episode of WNMOT podcast with Scott Radovanovich. WNMOT stands for - "We need more of this" and is a NZ podcast.
Our conversation flowed easily, as I've found all his other episodes that I've listened to previously have, and I always learn something new from Scott and his guests.
Throughout this episode I speak about how much damage is done to victim/survivors of CSA, particularly children abused by a trusted family member. (BTW - I never speak of the acts). I just try to explain the family toxicity, harm done to the survivors, behaviours we develop to try to deal with and understand what happened, and most importantly how to let go of any unfounded guilt or shame that so many of us carry throughout our lives. How to finally let go of the anchors holding us down.
Click here to listen -
https://open.spotify.com/episode/06X0Rfm6U99k1yhxPYYzqK
Scott has many other very important and impactful episodes to listen to, which I highly recommend.
HANDING THE SHAME BACK - PODCAST
During my advocacy work, I connected with Gloria Masters of "Handing the shame back" podcast.
I had the privelige to be on her show recently - To check out this episode click here - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jjc_KO48Ezk
Gloria is now an Author, Advocate and Survivor: and the woman behind the Global hand signal for under 16’s, released in June 2023.
Her charity in New Zealand helps with resources and the prevention and protection of children from sexual abuse. To find out more or make a donation, click on the link below.
"Raising my voice" to stop violence
CAPE - "CHILD ABUSE PREVENTION Education" - PODCAST
Guest speaker at "Moreton Bay Says No To Violence" Walk & Speaking event 31-5-24, opening up the dialogue of intra-familial childhood sexual abuse being a form of domestic violence.
Deb explains why "Intra-familial childhood sexual assault" should be included when speaking about "domestic violence."
Childhood sexual abuse = Domestic Violence
Click here to watch video
https://drive.google.com/file/d/1S8lkamTsc85Vw4VwSj-HIxvLu3d3G3EH/view?ts=665d47c1
abuse help, adult survivors, adult child abuse survivors
CAPE - "CHILD ABUSE PREVENTION Education" - PODCAST
CAPE - "CHILD ABUSE PREVENTION Education" - PODCAST
I came across the CAPE podcast by ex WA Detective Kristi McVee. CAPE stands for Child Abuse Prevention and Education. Kristi speaks with a vast aray of experts and lived experience guests on her podcast. Kristi and her guests give specific information, advice and tools to assist and guide parents in keeping their kids safe from abuse. I have personally learnt a lot just from listening to a few of her episodes and due to her laid-back approach to interviewing, find her show very relatable and easy to listen to.
I had the privelige to be on her show recently - To check out this episode click here - https://www.cape-au.com/podcasts/conversations-with-kristi/episodes/2148871978
BEYOND THE MARGINS - USA PODCAST
I connected with Jason from - Beyond the Margins over social media, and he was kind enough to have myself and my fellow Australian survivor friend, John Cardamone, on a few of his new podcast episodes.
This conversation features John Cardamone and myself, both survivors of childhood abuse, we share our personal stories and advocacy efforts. We also discuss the importance of education on recognizing signs of abuse, the impact of family dynamics, and the need for supportive responses to disclosures. John introduces his Be Calmer framework for effective communication with survivors, while I talk about my book, Circling the Wagons, which aims to shed light on the complexities of intra-familial abuse. The discussion also highlights resources for survivors seeking help and the importance of lived experience in understanding trauma.
Something to say YouTube - Coming soon
Jeremy Indika - Protecting children and teenagers from sexual abuse | Founder of Something to Say
I connected with Jeremy via Linkedin and have followed his journey of advocacy and education around protecting and teaching children how to stay safe.
He is doing ground breaking work in this arena in the UK, with his strength to stand up and say "this happened to me, and I don't want it happening to any other kids."
Video link of my disclosure - coming soon.
Counselling services around Brisbane
SERVICES AGAINST SEXUAL VIOLENCE
Laurel Place Inc. is a community-based, government funded, free, specialised and confidential Counselling service. They provide counselling, support, information and education relating to sexual violence across the Sunshine Coast, Moreton Bay, Gympie and South Burnett areas.
Their staff are specialist sexual assault practitioners who hold a range of qualifications in Psychology, Social Work, Counselling and Human Services.
Adults and Young People's Program
Their Adults and Young People’s Program provides specialist sexual assault counselling and support to young people (aged 12 and over) and adults who have experienced sexual assault or abuse at any time in their lives. Counselling can also be provided to non-offending supporters, including parents, care-givers and partners of people who have experienced sexual assault or abuse.
https://www.laurelplace.com.au/services/adults-and-young-peoples-program
Other services they offer - First Response Program, Children & Families Program, First Nations Client Support Worker, RESET (Youth Sexual Violence) and Women's Space.
They have offices at – Maroochydore, Morayfield, Gympie and Murgon
Click here to get in touch - https://www.laurelplace.com.au/contact-us
Isabella Semeraro - Counsellor
About Isabella -
Isabella values kindness, understanding, honesty, and curiosity in her counselling practice. She focuses strongly on the therapeutic relationship between herself and her clients and believes that her clients are the experts in their own lives. Isabella works from a values-based and client-centered approach, utilising a mixture of narrative, creative, and somatic therapies. Isabella enjoys supporting and empowering clients from all walks of life to overcome challenges they may be facing.
Services Isabella offers -
- Individual Counselling
- Child & Adolescent Counselling
- Couples Counselling
- Family Counselling
Isabella is also currently working as a sexual assault counsellor at a not for profit organisation.
She feels privileged to walk alongside and hear the stories of survivor
To contact Isabella click here - https://www.isabellasemerarocounselling.com/contact
Extra resources for men and teenagers
Strong Men with Jared Whitaker
Surf Online Safe - Internet Awareness
I was listening to a podcast (WNMOT - "we need more of this") with Scott Rado from NZ recently, and I heard Jared Whitaker's story of domestic abuse he suffered at the hands of his female partner. Ok now when you look at his picture above, you are gonna have some all too common responses. But I urge you to listen to this episode so you
I was listening to a podcast (WNMOT - "we need more of this") with Scott Rado from NZ recently, and I heard Jared Whitaker's story of domestic abuse he suffered at the hands of his female partner. Ok now when you look at his picture above, you are gonna have some all too common responses. But I urge you to listen to this episode so you can learn just how this can play out and believe me, he's not alone!
Here's a link to this episode- https://lnkd.in/gmDsfVrt
What Jared is doing now -
I am an author, speaker, and advocate dedicated to raising awareness of the serious issues men face, particularly around domestic abuse and narcissistic relationships.
Formerly a CEO of a software firm, I shifted my focus after personal health challenges to devote my life to making a meaningful impact in this space.
Through my books, YouTube channel, and lived experience speaking engagements, I highlight the often-overlooked struggles men endure and work to promote healing, understanding, and equality for both men and women.
I also provide domestic abuse coaching to help others recognize abusive patterns, navigate recovery, and rebuild their lives.
My mission is to shine a light on these critical topics, challenge stigmas, and offer resources and support to those in need.
Click here to find out more or contact Jared - www.jaredwhitaker.com
Surf Online Safe - Internet Awareness
Surf Online Safe - Internet Awareness
HOW TO KEEP YOUR CHILDREN SAFE ONLINE
“Paul was a WA Police Officer for 20 years with his last 6 years spent within Technology Crime.
Sextortion!
Paul says - Crimes which were once only ever experienced by adults are now affecting juveniles in huge numbers. Over the past 5 years in particular, I have noticed a marked increase in the number
HOW TO KEEP YOUR CHILDREN SAFE ONLINE
“Paul was a WA Police Officer for 20 years with his last 6 years spent within Technology Crime.
Sextortion!
Paul says - Crimes which were once only ever experienced by adults are now affecting juveniles in huge numbers. Over the past 5 years in particular, I have noticed a marked increase in the number of teenagers approaching me for assistance with some of the most serious of matters. Kids are making errors of judgement online and as their navigation of online environments grow with age, they are being exposed to more and more significant risk. One of the most concerning crimes being experienced by juveniles in more recent times is Sextortion.
Click here - https://www.surfonlinesafe.com.au/sextortion.html to find out more about what to and what not to do, if your child is targeted, and how to talk to your child about this heinous form of child abuse before it occurs.
SAMSN - Survivors & Mates Support Network
SAMSN - Survivors & Mates Support Network
SUPPORT FOR MALE SURVIVORS OF CHILD SEXUAL ABUSE
- Established in 2011, SAMSN is Australia’s leading organisation for male survivors of child sexual abuse and their supporters.
- Read more about SAMSN’s history here.
- SAMSN is a not-for-profit charity that evolved through collaboration between survivors and professionals to provide services to m
SUPPORT FOR MALE SURVIVORS OF CHILD SEXUAL ABUSE
- Established in 2011, SAMSN is Australia’s leading organisation for male survivors of child sexual abuse and their supporters.
- Read more about SAMSN’s history here.
- SAMSN is a not-for-profit charity that evolved through collaboration between survivors and professionals to provide services to male survivors, their families, and supporters.
- All male survivors of child sexual assault should know that the abuse was not their fault and that healing and recovery is possible.
- Regardless of his ethnicity, sexual orientation, age or religion, any man, including all expressions of male gender identity, can contact SAMSN for support.
- Our services for survivors and supporters are FREE.
Other survivor book resources I recommend
Resolve by Alice Perle
I feel real guilty by Jane Epstein
I feel real guilty by Jane Epstein
Reading "Resolve" by the talented Sunshine Coast woman Alice Perle, took me right back to my own childhood, including my own abuse.
I found it so relatable and easy to understand all the emotions that little Alice went through, and also the struggles that adult Alice had to deal with, in regards to the difficult family situations, later in life.
Little Alice does find her voice during her childhood, but the person she puts her trust in, betrays her in the worst way.
Hearing little Alice explain being scared to return home after school, was so distressing, as a child's home is supposed to be their safe place.
What a terrible experience for a child to try to navigate, but the strength of the woman who found her way through her own turmoil to try to help others, is astounding.
Alice is leading the way in Australia to desensitise an all too sensitive subject - sibling sexual abuse. She is doing ground breaking work in this arena of silence. And I am very proud to know her personally!
I would highly recommend this book for anyone who has suffered their own abuse, at the hands of a sibling.
Resolve is available on online retailers such as Amazon or direct from the author - link below
I feel real guilty by Jane Epstein
I feel real guilty by Jane Epstein
I feel real guilty by Jane Epstein
Reading this extraordinary memoir of sibling sexual abuse, brought up a lot of emotions for me personally, as a survivor myself of intra-familial childhood sexual abuse.
Jane’s depiction of the choices she made later in life, correlating specifically from her abuse as a young girl, shows just how damaging this early life abuse becomes, for survivors.
I loved the way Jane recounts the memories of her younger self at 19 onwards, her career choices back then and how this leads her into unsafe situations, never really understanding why at the time.
Jane ultimately comes to understand what really happened to her as a young girl, and shows us how abuse not dealt with finds a way to the surface and impacts every part of our later lives.
Her courage to speak up about this taboo subject to help others, is impactful, courageous and an inspiration to others who may also have been impacted by SSA.
I have recently connected with Jane and found her to be a strong, warm and welcoming woman!
I highly recommend this book for anyone wanting to understand SSA from a lived experience perspective.
I feel real guilty is available from online retailers such as amazon or direct from the author - link below
On angels wings by gloria masters
I feel real guilty by Jane Epstein
On angels wings by gloria masters
A woman warrior
Gloria Masters, the author of this book, is one of the strongest women I know! On Angels wings, is the only way this little girl could have survived her horrendous treatment.
Treatment no child or other living being should ever be subjected to.
Sex trafficked by her own father and grandmother; years of horrendous abuse of every kind, she never stood a chance of getting help.
You will be amazed at the strength of this woman, resilience of this young child, and overwhelmed by how so many people could miss all the signs of abuse, this little girl suffered.
A true story of survival and resilience!
Gloria now runs a charity in NZ helping to prevent and protect children from future and ongoing child sexual abuse.
She is the epitome of what true courage and resilience looks like and a very warm and caring individual. Anyone wanting to donate to a good cause - here it is!!!
On angels wings is available from online retailers such as Amazon or direct from the author - link below -
Rideshare tips by Cordisco & Saile - USA
WHAT TO LOOK OUT FOR
- Request your ride before going outside. Lingering outside alone while looking down at your phone is dangerous.
- Keep your phone charged when you go out. This will not only prevent you from being stuck without a ride but also allow you to text or call someone in an emergency.
- Before boarding, make sure the car, license plate, and driver are correct. Don’t get into a car until you’ve confirmed that the car and driver match those assigned to you.
- Have the driver confirm your name. Don’t walk up and ask if a ride is for you. Wait and see if the driver knows your name before entering the car.
- Check if the child safety lock has been activated before entering the car. One key danger of rideshare vehicles is that a driver can covertly activate the child lock, trapping you in the backseat. Make sure you can operate the inside handle normally before closing the door.
Be aware
- Share your rideshare route with a friend or family member. Many rideshare apps have features that let you text your route to another person so they can follow it in real-time. If your rideshare driver takes an unexpected detour, your trusted contact can find your location.
- Sit in the back seat of the car. Sitting in the front passenger seat puts you very close to the driver, meaning it’s much easier for them to grab or otherwise physically hurt you.
- Always wear your seatbelt. Wearing a seatbelt can prevent injury from a collision.
- Never give out your personal information. Your driver never needs to know your full name, phone number, home address, or other identifying information.
- Never pay cash. You might occasionally see a driver offering rides for cash without a rideshare app. The company likely hasn’t vetted an unregulated cash-only driver, so don’t get into their car.
- Only communicate with your driver in the rideshare app. Don’t text or call a rideshare driver using your own number.
GET HOME safe
GET HOME safe
- Keep an eye on your surroundings. Follow the route on your phone to better understand how to get home if you arrive in the wrong place.
- Travel in groups when you can. Sharing a car with people you trust means there are witnesses if anyone gets hurt.
- Trust your instincts. If something doesn’t feel right, don’t get into the vehicle. It’s always okay to cancel the ride if something seems off.
- Call for help if you’re in trouble. If you’re in danger, call a friend, the police, or another trusted party. If needed, shout out the window.
- Exit the vehicle in a safe area. Don’t exit the car somewhere unfamiliar, unexpected, or otherwise dangerous. Try to exit in a brightly lit, familiar space if possible.
Thank you to Cordisco & Saile LLC in the USA, for reaching out to me to add these very important ride share safety tips to my advocacy website.
Link below for anyone living in the USA -
https://www.cordiscosaile.com/rideshare-safety-tips/
Disclaimer - Dragonfly advocacy has no professional affiliation with
Cordisco & Saile LLC.
Organisations for further help in Australia
Child Sexual Abuse support services
mental health support & suicide prevention
child protection Education & Resources
Blue Knot - https://blueknot.org.au
Partners Speak - https://www.partnerspeak.org.au
Knowmore - https://knowmore.org.au
child protection Education & Resources
mental health support & suicide prevention
child protection Education & Resources
The Daniel Morcombe Foundation -
John Cardamone - Body Safe Cards
https://johncardamone.com.au/body-safe-cards/
Safe4kids - https://safe4kids.com.au
mental health support & suicide prevention
mental health support & suicide prevention
mental health support & suicide prevention
Lifeline Australia - https://www.lifeline.org.au
Kids Helpline - https://kidshelpline.com.au
Beyond Blue - https://www.beyondblue.org.au
domestic violence support services
domestic violence support services
mental health support & suicide prevention
Encircle - https://encircle.org.au
1800Respect - https://www.1800respect.org.au
White Ribbon - https://whiteribbon.org.au/helplines/
DVConnect - https://www.dvconnect.org
cyber safety & online resources
domestic violence support services
cyber safety & online resources
Surf Online Safe - https://surfonlinesafe.com.au
esafety - https://www.esafety.gov.au
esafekids - https://www.esafekids.com.au
Youth Law Australia - https://yla.org.au
Think U Know - https://www.thinkuknow.org.au
Adult survivor resources
domestic violence support services
cyber safety & online resources
Circling the Wagons paperback - https://dragonflyadvocacy.com.au/ols/products/circling-the-wagons-paperback
Handing The Shame Back - https://www.handingtheshameback.org
Blueknot - https://blueknot.org.au
Incest AWARE is an alliance of survivors, supporters, and organizations on a mission to keep children safe from incest in the first place, secure safe methods of intervention, support survivors in recovery, and end recidivism by transforming people who harmhttp://www.incestaware.org/
Contact Me
Questions or Comments or review my book
Dragonfly Advocacy
Brisbane, Queensland, Australia
